Who you are isn't passive or static or unchanging. It is a vital design,...that needs to unfold and express itself through the medium of your whole life. How to Get What You REALLY Want. Barbara Sher

Since we never know when we are going to leave this earth, when are we going to express who we really are? When are we going to explore who we are? Why not now? Is the laundry more important? Or anything else?

Victim thinking

I have learned that, if we set our mind to it, we (can) ... find misery in any situation, even the most wonderful of circumstances. The Language of Letting Go. Melody Beattie

Believing we are victims, and then seeing the world and other people as perpetrators, is a mental habit born out of difficult circumstances in the past. With help from others, we can learn to see ourselves, others, and the world in a completely different way. Since we think we are defending ourselves by believing our victim thinking, letting go of it is hard - but necessary in order to have the life of our dreams. We can learn to focus on what's good in our lives and believe we can create the life of our dreams.

Subjective Decision

"Happiness is a subjective decision...Many people are addicted to suffering and have a mental haibt of pointing out the worst in people or situations. Not only are they robbing themselves of joy, but their failure to appreciate all the goodness that life has to offer actually diminishes that good." Everyday Grace. Marianne Williamson

When we have a thought that something would be fun and then follow it up with the thought that we'll do it next week, next year, or sometime - we've just robbed ourselves of a piece of our lives. Getting to the life of our dreams certainly includes actually doing the fun we think about - either today or putting it on the schedule for the first possible opportunity.

What you think you want is usually not really what you want. Most of the time, what you think you want is merely a clue, a hint, a pointer to what you truly desire. When you feel that you want something, challenge yourself to find the deeper desire that's responsible. Ask yourself why, and be completely honest with your answer.

If you pursue life's fleeting, superficial wants, you're setting yourself up for disappointment, even when you get what you want. Instead, take the time to understand your deeper desires, and you'll find countless ways to bring real, meaningful and lasting value to life.

When there's something you want, ask why, again and again until you uncover a purpose so authentic that it cannot be denied. And when you do, you'll also see that your desire has already begun to be fulfilled.
-- Ralph Marston

It can take years to discover that what we think we want isn't it. But once we know to look deeper - because we have so often gotten what we wanted and it didn't bring the joy and value to our lives we thought it would - we don't have to waste time on the wishes for a new car, new clothes, and more money. We can zero in on who we really are and what our purposes on earth really are. From purpose flows true desire and the capability to capture the life of our dreams.

Yes I can

Don't panic.
Breath.
Stop saying, I can't.
Part of the language of letting go is learning to say, I can.
Give the gift of confidence to yourself. ~Melody Beattie

What a gift it is to stop saying, "I can't." I had no idea it would have so much magic. The truth is, "I can!" Because I have help whenever I am willing to receive it. Because I am so much more capable than I ever imagined. Because I know my life could be over in the next second and I don't want to waste my life saying, "I can't."

It is wise to plan for the future and to prepare for the future. Yet there is no need to worry about the future.
Because whatever the future may bring, you will find an answer for it. Whatever events may transpire, you can craft a powerful and successful response that will move your life forward. It may indeed be very difficult. And in transcending that difficulty, you have the opportunity to find great fulfillment. Ralph Marston

For many of us the concept of simply planning and preparing instead of worrying is revolutionary. We seem to be taught that worrying is the thing good people do and that it will somehow help. But it definitely does not. We are far more capable than we believe - we are capable of creatively responding to difficult events in a way that benefits us and the world. In so doing, we learn and grow in ways we never could have imagined.

Thoughts

It's not too late! The best is yet to come. Invest in thought, follow your hunches, and live the life of your dreams. Public disclosure: This offer is irrevocable. You're now an investor whether you know it or not. All of your thoughts will become things. No lawyers can help you. Save yourself; choose the good ones." "Notes from the Universe," by Mike Dooley

If you believe in the power of thought to create the life of your dreams, it doesn't matter what's going on in the economy. So, we should all choose the good thoughts. Maybe the economy would change. Even if it doesn't, our own economy will change!

Put Energy in to Imagining the Best

Go beyond your dissatisfaction with what is, and put your energy into imagining the best of what can be. Clearly know where you wish to go, and you'll naturally make the effort that gets you there. - Ralph Marston

For many, this is not as easy or as simple as it sounds. We may have a lifetime of imagining the worst as a way of protecting ourselves from disappointment. Of course, imagining the worst never works to make our lives better. But it is definitely worth the effort to change our thinking so that we can imagine the best.

More on building strength

If I've changed my schedule so I'm getting enough sleep, I'm ready to look at what else I need to build strength for change. Often, many of us, in this day of over scheduling and over busyness, are undernourished because we don't take the time to provide ourselves with good food. Finding ways to get the nutrition we need is vital to building the life of our dreams. So, the first step must be to go back to the list of things to stop doing, and find something that will free up the time and money for nourishing ourselves. Then, we may need to learn learn what good nutrition is. For good food to happen, we will need to make a plan to provide it for ourselves. The life of our dreams must include lovely food that gives us the energy and joy we deserve.

Deep Inside Us All is Who We Really Are

Maybe we have been taught by the people around us and then by ourselves that we are something other than a beautiful, loveable child of God/Higher Power. But even so, deep inside us is the person we really are, and by taking a little quiet time to search inside for that child of God, we can more easily imagine the life of our dreams. Then we can think lovely thoughts from which will flow loving feelings from which will flow actions that build the life of our dreams.

Building strength

Making change is hard, so we need strength. How do we get it? Well, for starters we can begin by making getting enough sleep a priority. In this day of over work and over scheduling, this change in itself may be a challenge. But if we are sleep deprived, we are going to struggle just in doing daily life, not to mention making a change.

Making a Not-to-do List

Change begins with making a place for the new. It's not about putting the new on the already existing to-do list. That's a recipe for misery! Looking at the to-do list with determination to remove the unnecessary is the first step to change. However, it's also not about removing something we love just because it seems "unnecessary." Although it's hard to get past the voice in our heads that says what we "should" do, remember that the point is to build the life of our dreams. Removing what we love from our lives is NOT the first step. Instead, look for stuff we don't love and find ways to remove that!

Your power depends on your perspective. And your perspective is yours to choose. If you convince yourself that you're having a bad day, you will indeed experience a frustrating and unproductive day. If you assume that circumstances are allied against you, then you'll encounter great trouble in getting anything done.There is a much more powerful alternative. You can choose to adopt and embrace a perspective that will work for you rather than against you.Think of how you would feel if conditions were perfect, if your actions were highly effective and if everything was going exactly your way. Then, once you imagine how it would feel, go ahead and allow yourself to actually feel that way.How would you act today if you knew you were going to be completely successful? Go ahead and act that way, and the success will come.Put yourself in a position of power by choosing to feel the positive influence and effectiveness that you know is yours. Adopt the thoughts, feelings and actions of success, and you will indeed bring success to life.~Ralph Marston

Wow! I really love this one. What freedom. What fun. Acting like everything is going well when it's not is something I've tried and found to be incredibly powerful, not to mention the fact that conditions usually change along with my attitude.

Imagine

What can you imagine? What would you most like to imagine?
Your life flows out from your imagination. Whatever you choose to become, you have first chosen to imagine.
No, life does not come to pass exactly as you have imagined it. There are many surprises and distractions along the way.
And yet, your most persistent and consistent imaginings do indeed set the direction for your life. Though it is impossible to foresee every pebble in every road, you can certainly choose which roads to travel based on where you know they lead.
Let your imagination be the pioneer that explores exciting and fulfilling new worlds. From the best of those worlds, find the one for you.
Imagine a great and wonderful life for yourself, with passion and loving detail. As soon as you imagine it, you begin the process of truly living it.
-- Ralph Marston

We know when we've imagined the life of our dreams - of our true selves. We can feel it. It makes us smile.

Happiness

Here are some gems from recent research on happiness: $50,000 a year income is enough for happiness. People are happier at that amount than any amount more. Under that amount and there's not quite enough for happiness. People are absolutely terrible at figuring out what will make us happy. We imagine that the right relationship will make us happy or the right amount of money, or the right house, or children, or children that behave the way we want them to, or...........and if we do get those things we're no happier than before as soon as the excitement wears off. So what does this mean to those of us who are imagining the life of our dreams that we are committed to creating? Probably it means that we're going to have to consult our hearts and our true selves for the answer to what would be the life of our dreams instead of what our culture has hoodwinked us into believing will make us happy.

Time

It seems that time is the thing that most often gets in the way of the life of our dreams. There is so much to do and life is so complicated and urgent. A few hundred years ago people got up when the sun came up and went to bed when the sun went down. If the sun is the light you see by, this schedule is what works. In addition, people were pretty focused on getting food and shelter and someone to mate with. Their life span was short and uncomplicated. Now getting food and shelter is pretty well taken care of for most people and we have more time to fill with the endless array of alternatives available. This leads to believing that the solution is to learn how to do everything very quickly and efficiently as well as multi-tasking. This doesn't work and leads to exhaustion, wrecks and misery. Instead our strategy needs to be discovering what really brings us joy and delight and doing that right after the absolute necesssities. (Absolute necessities are those activities that contribute to our survival!)

Healing

Sometimes the path with a heart to the life of our dreams leads to some serious work in the area of healing. As is always true in every life, we get hurt, we have losses and disappointments, we are sometimes ill. Learning to heal with the help of our creator and the people who love us is the most important work we can do. Doing this work gives us the ability to make a plan for our lives and carry it out. Without some healing, we will not have enough energy and clarity to focus. For most of us that will involve the help of a really good professional plus some reading so that we can understand what's going on.

Every delay is a wasted opportunity. For time is a most precious and irreplaceable resource.
Each time you think of an excuse for not taking action, overpower it. For each single excuse, quickly come up with two good, solid believable reasons for moving forward.
Yes, if you choose you can talk yourself out of doing what must be done. Fortunately, you are just as empowered to talk yourself into taking any necessary action.
Decide to blast away every excuse with two good reasons for going ahead and moving forward. And the odds are two to one that you will indeed reach whatever goal you choose.
-- Ralph Marston

So, let's try this and see what happens. The procrastination list (the stuff on the "to-do" list that stays there from day to day, month to month, year to year) that stays in our heads, draining our energy, making us feel less than and fearful - two good reasons might banish it forever. Another step into the life of our dreams!

Finding the path with a heart

If in real life we know at all times that the present is all we have, love is all that matters, and we are all going to die at some unknown time, we might want to find the path to the life of our dreams as soon as we can. So....how do we find the path we will need to travel to find the life of our dreams? There's a mystery! If you are past middle age, it might be wise to look for a short cut.

Maybe we should start with what's is really important to us. What would we regret if we died tomorrow? Maybe we would want to tell those we love that we love them. Maybe we would want to find even more people to love. Maybe we would want to make a difference in the world. Maybe we would want to learn how to enjoy each moment of the precious life we've been given. Maybe....

The only way to get to this new place is to endure a time of difficulty, which is a challenge we can confidently handle, if we remember that it will lead to the change we seek in our lives. Our bodies, hearts, and minds always need time to adjust to a new way of doing things, but they will adapt, and even become our allies, if we remain true to our vision of a new way. Daily Om

Making changes is extremely tough. So being compassionate with ourselves comes first. Then we will need the support of others. Our old habits are deeply ingrained in our bodies and minds and emotions so the change to habits that support the lovely life we were created for (in spite of problems and difficulties) will seem strange, scary and painful. But we will adjust and eventually love our new habits.

Empowering by changing small things

Who am I? To answer this, we must first learn to become more aware of ourselves. To be aware, we must STOP and PAY ATTENTION! We need to STOP and objectively watch ourselves in action. We live most of our lives by habit. These habits keep us stuck in patterns that limit our experience of life. Once we detect a pattern we were previously unconscious of, we can choose differently, if we want. With awareness comes choice and with choice, we gain freedom. ~higherawareness.com

Changing small things in my life helps me be more aware and helps me stay grounded in the present. For example, consciously deciding what music I will listen to during my day, lighting scented candles, giving real thought to what I want to eat, buying some fresh flowers, putting potpourri in my car, taking a minute to watch the birds at the bird feeder - all these add pleasure and joy to my day. Just the fact that I took the split seconds (that's all it takes) to add these to my life, empowers me to further design a beautiful day for myself.

Fun

"Pain has important, but limited survival value. Pleasure drives us toward survival, loving our children and mates, and keeping our spirits up when times are bad. We might say pleasure is the root of hope and optimism. Have fun. Play." Dr. Drew Pinsky

Maybe a lot of our inborn power is generated by living a lovely life full of pleasure. This philosophy goes against some of the prevailing beliefs of our time, but what if the Creator is sad that the life given us is made painful by our running away from pleasure? Maybe the Creator hopes we will enjoy the beautiful life we've been given.

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller

The word "power" seems to elicit a sense of control -maybe even the ability to make other people do what we want. But "empowerment" has NOTHING to do with that kind of power. When we are "empowered," we live with a sense of responsibility and purpose - for our own lives and for our connection to the world.

When we are empowered, we have a sense of direction as well as the confidence and courage to move forward into adventure. Helen Keller's obstacles were as large as the Rocky Mountains. Most other human beings would have had to take a jumbo jet flight over them to be able to eat, dress, and communicate with other people. But she accomplished all that plus traveled the world having adventures. What in the world is our excuse for not living an empowered life? Who wouldn't want to be empowered to have a romantic if risky life?